Most bridal shower stress comes from doing things in the wrong order — booking a venue before you know the guest count, or choosing a theme before you've agreed a budget. Below is the full checklist, in sequence, with the questions to settle first.
Settle these five things before you plan anything
- Who's hosting and who's paying. Traditionally the maid of honour and bridal party; increasingly it's shared or hosted by family. Agree it explicitly, in writing, early.
- The budget, as a number. Not a feeling. Include food, drink, venue, décor, invitations, favours and the cake.
- The bride's actual preference. Some want forty people and games; some want twelve people and lunch. Ask.
- The rough date. Usually one to three months before the wedding, and not the same weekend as the bachelorette.
- Who's on the guest list. Everyone invited to the shower should be invited to the wedding.
Eight weeks out
8 weeks
- Confirm the date with the bride and both mothers.
- Finalise the guest list with the bride and collect addresses or emails.
- Set the budget and how it's being split between hosts.
- Choose the format: brunch, lunch, afternoon tea, cocktails, at-home.
- Book the venue, or confirm whose home it is.
- Decide whether there's a theme or simply a colour direction.
- Ask the bride about games — some love them, some genuinely don't.
Six weeks out
6 weeks
- Send invitations. Digital is entirely acceptable; paper is lovely if the budget allows.
- Confirm the registry link and include it on the invitation.
- Book catering, or plan the menu if you're cooking.
- Order any custom items — signage, personalised favours, a cake topper.
- Set up an RSVP tracker so you're not counting messages across three apps.
- Agree who's taking photographs.
Four weeks out
4 weeks
- Order décor: linens, flowers, tableware, candles.
- Order or bake the cake and confirm collection timing.
- Buy or make favours, if you're doing them. They're optional.
- Plan the games or the alternative — a memory-sharing moment, a recipe card station, a photo wall.
- Confirm the drinks plan, including non-alcoholic options.
- Check dietary requirements from RSVPs.
Two weeks out
2 weeks
- Chase outstanding RSVPs and give the venue or caterer a final number.
- Finalise the seating or the flow of the room.
- Buy the bride's gift from the hosts, if there is one.
- Write the timeline: arrival, food, gifts, cake, speeches, end.
- Assign jobs — who greets, who records gifts, who cuts the cake, who clears.
- Confirm the flower order and collection time.
One week out
1 week
- Shop for non-perishables, drinks and ice.
- Print or write place cards, signage and any game materials.
- Charge cameras and buy batteries or a memory card if needed.
- Send the timeline to the other hosts and the bridal party.
- Confirm the bride knows the arrival time and dress code.
- Prepare a gift-recording sheet — she'll need it for thank-you notes.
The day before
The day before
- Collect flowers, cake and any rentals.
- Prepare anything that keeps overnight.
- Set the table and stage the décor if the venue allows.
- Pack an emergency box: scissors, tape, safety pins, matches, extra candles, paper towels, stain remover, plasters, a phone charger.
- Chill drinks.
The day of
| Time | What's happening |
|---|---|
| 2–3 hours before | Arrive, finish setup, arrange food and flowers |
| 1 hour before | Set out drinks, light candles, cue music |
| 15 minutes before | Hosts in position; bride arrives just after the first guests |
| First 45 minutes | Arrival drinks, mingling, photographs |
| Next hour | Food, then a short toast if there is one |
| Following hour | Gifts, with someone recording who gave what |
| Final 30 minutes | Cake, goodbyes, favours as guests leave |
Afterwards
- Give the bride the gift record the same day, while it's accurate.
- Return rentals and settle any outstanding split between hosts.
- Share photographs with the bride and the guests.
If the bachelorette is being planned alongside this, read how to plan a bachelorette weekend before locking either date — the two events compete for the same guests, budgets and weekends.
